Use this tool to talk to each other about how you are feeling about the marriage. You fill in your responses to the Marital Satisfaction Questionnaire and ask your spouse to do the same. You can share your scores or you can show your spouse how you responded to each question.  Remember, your score is not carved in stone. Psychologists find that relationships can change much more quickly than people change.


10           9             8             7             6             5             4            3            2            1

Pleased                                                  Neutral                                          Not Pleased

 I am:

1.   Pleased with the amount we talk to each other

2.   Happy with the friends we have in common

3.   Satisfied with our sex life

4.   In agreement with the amount of time you or we spend at work and at home

5.   Okay with how we each spend money

6.   Satisfied with the kind of parent you are (or, pleased with family planning)

7.   Of the opinion we are on the same team

8.   Okay with how we spend our free time (e.g. tv watching, sports, vacations, etc.)

9.   Happy with your overall outlook about life (e.g. values, attitudes, religious beliefs)

10.  Content with the way you relate to members of my family (parents, siblings)

11.  Accepting of the way you relate to your family

12.  Pleased with your habits, mannerisms and overall appearance


84+…………Very high satisfaction with your marriage

72-83………About average satisfaction

Below 60….Very low satisfaction with your marriage

Adapted from The Practice of Multi-Modal Therapy by Arnold Lazarus, with permission